It’s been nine years since we tied the knot.
We’d known each other 9 months.
He was a self-proclaimed atheist, Red-Necked Israeli, who didn’t believe in global warming!
Me, I was a Berkeley yogi-artist, all about love, and the oneness of us all.
Lets just say, we didn’t meet on Match.com.
No, the Universe threw us together in one moment in time in San Francisco at a gathering about paradigms of consciousness in business. He was looking for a Lesbian wife to marry for money because he was about to lose his work visa for the 3rd time in 10 years and didn’t want to be deported, and I had a girl crush on the hostess of the party I’d met just 2 weeks before.
Yeah. It was a fluke.
And then again. It wasn’t.
Our vows were all about freedom.
Inner and outer freedom and helping each other get there.
They felt loving and kind, supportive and real.
What we didn’t know then was that the road towards inner and outer freedom was going to be craggy and steep, filled with potholes, and land-mines. In fact, it was going to be a war of egos battling out the polarities of our positions until we melted, bit by bit into the essence of who we were, stripped of arrogance, pride, blame, shame, envy, jealousy and anger.
We’ve ridden through some fires, and we arrive on this 9th anniversary on the other side, having survived.
And each other.
We’ve stripped away much of the rough and shoddy parts of ourselves. To become more real. More raw.
More tolerant and kind.
More loving and open to the Other.
We’ve groked that “ours” is not the only way. That “the other” whoever that is, has a valid perspective. That anything anyone else says is not personal. It’s about them. Not you.
We arrive on this 9th wedding anniversary with a new love. With a new relationship – literally a new way of relating. To ourselves. To each other. We have freed ourselves to live side by side. Not comingled with shoulds and shame.
Oh, we don’t have it down, there are still quibbles and minor quakes. But overall, I am free to be me, as is he!